Two steps forward...

one step back. siiiigh. The past 2 days have been NOT GOOD. I ate an obscene amount of peanut butter (with a spoon, straight outta the jar) yesterday, and tons of cheese, fruit, nuts, and food that I didn't need. Now I feel really fat and gross and frustrated. I should have taken a step back, read my cards, had a mug of tea, and gone for a walk. But I didn't.

The triathlon I'm doing is only 5 weeks away, so I really need to get serious. Plus, I'm just sick of feeling bad about myself. It's a million degrees out, and I'm still wearing pants and long sleeves. It's ridiculous.

The next two weeks I'm going to go back to phase 1 of the SBD (so no fruit, starchy carbs, etc.), and lay off the booze. Enough is enough!

Day 40 is Enrich Your Life. It says to not wait until you lose weight to do the things you want to do. (That probably includes wearing shorts, eh?) Hopefully when these 2 weeks are up I'll feel ready to do that!

Day 39

Wow, getting close to the end of the book! I plan to keep blogging when it's done though, until I reach my goal weight. (Which, at this rate, will be in about 6 months :S)

Despite the fact that things are moving along sloooowly, it's been going pretty well overall. I still struggle a lot with wanting to eat when I'm not hungry...especially when I'm kind of stressed. But I haven't totally binged on junk food in ages, which is huge progress. That was the thing that really frustrated me the most.

Tonight I cooked up a big spaghetti squash, and then mixed in with garlic, red pepper flakes, shallots and olive oil...YUM. Can't wait to eat it for lunch tomorrow. I also bought some okra yesterday, which I have never eaten before...I'll have to figure out what to do with it!

Day 39 is Keep Up With Exercise. I am happy to say that this is one thing I do not struggle with! Once I get into a workout routine, I hate hate hate missing a workout. Even at 6am, I would way rather go to the gym than sleep in and miss it! My workouts have been going pretty well recently too...nothing crazy, but good steady progress.

good night!

Day 38

Remember how I was whining last week about how I ate waaaay to much fruit at "snack time" at work last week? This week I had one small bowl of fruit, and then I was was still hungry, so I filled up on veggies. I didn't even CONSIDER eating the desserts and hot wings and other such foods they had there. And I feel so much happier for it. GO ME!

The scale was up a bit today, but whatever. I can feel my muscles starting to come back, and I'm really excited about that. And I'm just about to do a bike (stationary) workout and watch some tv now...all in all, things are looking up!

Day 38 is Dealing With Plateaus. I'm hoping that since I am losing weight so freaking slowly to begin with I won't reach a plateau any time soon. (Will I even know if it's a plateau?!) But if I do, I'm ready!

Day 37

145.8 today! I am SO HAPPY! I feel motivated all over again :)

I've been doing really well with food...at night I roast/chop/prepare in some way veggies to eat at work the next day. As we speak I'm roasting brussel sprouts and kabocha squash. I'll sprinkle the kabocha with saigon cinnamon & sweet n' low, and it is delicious cold the next day. Like dessert, practically.

Yesterday I did a really good swim workout, and I planned on biking tonight, but I'm going to go back to work instead :S I have a bunch of stuff to finish up, and I want to do a good job of it, since I'm still new and all. I did do some strength training this morning, so at least I got that in.

Day 37 is Reduce Stress. I was feeling a LOT of stress at work yesterday...I was overwhelmed by the amount of stuff the expect me to know, and how fast they expect me to do it! But I figure I will just do the best I can (and I talked to my boss about extending the deadline a bit), and if it doesn't work out, then oh well...at least this is just a contract position anyway :)

Anyway, Judith has a bunch of suggestions about reducing stress. I don't think I'm a stress-y person in general (definitely not one of those perfectionist types), and really, my life is not that stressful to begin with. But I will give them a try...especially the relaxation part.

Day 36

So, tomorrow is weigh-in day...kinda nervous. I doubt I'll be down from last week, but oh well.

I've been doing really well with exercise, now that I have a bit more time on my hands. I've been eating pretty well too. So hopefully it'll all come together!

Day 36 is 'Believe It'. And I do!

Day 35

148.6 this morning (and I was even feeling kind of dehydrated). Heavy sighs.

The good news is that I'm pretty much done the work I was doing at nights, so I'll be able to add some evening workouts back in. My triathlon is 6 weeks away so I NEED to get my ass in gear. It'll be great to exercise more, but really, it's my eating that is bringing me down.

Here's what I plan to do to fix it:

- NO NUTS. yes, they're a "health food", but way too calorie dense in the quantities that I eat them.

- ONE serving of fruit, per day, max. Whether it's free or not!

- TWO diet cokes per day, max. (I'll cut back to one, and hopefully zero at some point, but I'm drinking it like it's going out of style at work, and even though it doesn't have calories it still can't be good for me). I'll drink lots of tea and water instead.

- Otherwise, stick to all south beach diet foods. Basically I'll be eating loads of vegetables, eggs, and lean meat.

- I'm going to plan out realistic meal plans in the evening and pack my lunch for the next day, and then say NO CHOICE when there's food that isn't on my meal plan.

Day 35 is another 'Get Ready to Weigh In' day...I don't weigh in till Tuesday, so hopefully I can turn things around before then!

Day 34

A much better day today. I did eat 2 hotdogs at the bbq, but I took the bun off, and I didn't eat any of the other stuff there. And when I stopped off at the grocery store on my way home from work I was really hungry...and I was tempted to buy some granola bars or cheese strings, but I knew that, being hungry, I would definitely eat way too many of them. So I bought 100g of turkey breast from the deli, and ate that in the car to tide me over.

Then, after I ate dinner, I still felt like eating stuff, but I had a big glass of water and went for a walk, and now it has passed. I told myself that the kitchen is closed for the day, and that is that.

I am allllmost done the work stuff I'm doing, so I'm hoping to finally get to bed early tonight. I haven't been getting nearly enough sleep this week!

Day 34 is Solve Problems. When I have negative thoughts, I'm supposed to go through the 7 steps and figure out what to do. I'll give it a shot!